Lone Ranger

Recently my husband is always away on work basis.. Last week he was away to KL.. then to KL again.. now he's in Bintulu...
I hardly spend time with him lately and i do miss him so much...
its either he's home at night or.. he's away...
I feel a bit lonely..

The new maid i have, well,i'm not that 'connected' with her yet..
not to mention the communication barrier we had between KL language.. and Indon Kalmantan..
I cant really share or let go my daily complaints or stories with her yet..
Even tho she smiles, but i know sometimes whatever i said might be something she doesnt understand much..
good respond tho.. but she's just doing it so it doesnt hurt my feelings...

As a chatterbox myself, its kinda frusterating...
I feel a bit lonely...

I miss my mom and how she always listen to me whenever i have those daily complaints or stories to share..
over dinner or in the kitchen..
or even while both of us watching TV together..

Friends? Well, most of them are in KL... i do have Syarina to talk with...
but talking over the phone and smsing is quite diferent compare to talking face-to-face, seeing the expression on the face...
ah.. frusterating..
I feel a bit lonely..

When i look at my son, i always feel pity and sorry for him as he doesnt have anyone to play with..
he used to enjoy having uncles and aunties to play around and 'totok' or 'papah' to bermanja...
look at him..
still young.. and already lonely...

Just by thinking about Diana's leaving Portrade.. I actually burst into tears one nite..
I realise that Diana is the only one i've been sharing my feeling the most...
A chatterbox to another chaterbox.. what a chemistry...
and to think of how boring my life could be later on in KPA..
I feel very lonely....

Suddenly i realise i have no one to turn to...
Ah.. life of a lone ranger in a stranger land...

Not forgetting me now as a preggo.. I feel that this pregnancy have no special feeling.. Way before when i was pregnant with Zharif...
everybody was showing their concern.. the attention and being spoilled a bit.. was actually kinda fun...
and always around with family and friends...

*sob* *sob*...

I'm lonely...
I wish i can just go home.....